Urine Luck | Jamaican me crazy, Irie Kitchen

By Emily Dressler

Upon first walking into Irie Kitchen a few months ago, I knew I would love their bathrooms (and their jerk chicken. And jerk salsa. And everything). The restaurant is vibrant and practically pulsing. I can’t wait to come on a dreary day during the month of NovDecMarch or whatever we call winter to spring in Ohio. The colors, though they are bright and maybe even aggressive, will soothe my soul and warm me up.

If you walk in the back door, you will get to the bathrooms before you get to the dining area. They are on the left. If you’re coming from the front door, the bathrooms will be past the dining area on the right, obviously. The women’s room is actually the wo-mon’s room, which sounds much cooler than women’s. The men’s is the mon’s. I bet you could use whichever one you wanted and no one would care. I didn’t use the mon’s room, but I am assuming it has a changing table like the wo-mon’s room does because changing diapers is a responsibility shared by both sexes.

Read more Urine Luck.

If there’s one thing I love, it’s words of affirmation in a public bathroom. I effing love it. I need it. On the wall opposite the door in the wo-mon’s room, there’s a neon light that says “Hello gorgeous”. I love it but if I could add one thing, I would add a comma after “Hello” because this is a direct address. Can you do commas on neon lights? 

On the bright yellow door, a big painted message reads, “Beautiful and strong Shine your light on the world.” Yes, yes, I will, thank you for the reminder. 

There are probably some competing or clashing colors in this bathroom, but I don’t care. I love it just the way it is. The walls look lovely and hand-painted with large leaves and flowers. There are six lizard wall-art items, which might sound like a lot for such a small space but shut up if that bothers you. 

The sink had a QR code on it, but I didn’t scan it because sometimes I think we are inundated with QR codes and data (and data mining) and I realized that I didn’t need to know everything about this sink. But now I’m worried that the QR code would have sent me to some cool trivia site or maybe some bathroom gamification thing, but I think I just have FOMO about QR codes now. Cool. 

I do hope that the mon’s room also has some positive affirmations or maybe just some reminders for men to be tolerant and cool people. Someone please let me know. 

The water pressure and temperature  in the automatic sink was perfect. Soap: perfect. Hand dryer: okay. 

Maybe all the bright colors are tricking me into happiness, but I don’t think that’s it exactly. I think I just love this bathroom and that’s why I am giving it 5/5 toilets. Congrats, guys, it’s a pandemic first! 

Emily Dressler writes about toilets and bathrooms for the Devil Strip. She is also a copy editor. She is also on the Board of Directors at the Devil Strip. 

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