Copley Coffee & Games
by Marissa Marangoni
As a resident of Copley Township, I’ve passed through the charming Copley Circle at least once every other day for the last 10 years. And, at least every other day for the last 10 years while passing through the Circle, I’ve thought, “Gee, it would be nice to have some food and drinks here.” Little did I know my decade-long dream would become a reality this winter. I’m not saying I have a powerful mind, but I’m just pointing out that my persistent wish might’ve helped get Copley Coffee & Games started.
In a pizza-shop-turned-coffee-hangout, Copley Coffee boasts a rich selection of coffee (or so I am told; coffee shoots my anxiety through the roof, so I avoid it), fresh honey, cheeses, pastries, and other local goodies to satisfy all of your stomach needs. According to the website, a breakfast menu is coming, and I cannot wait to sit down and eat some bagels while perusing the rather large selection of books on the shelves.
I’d say I can’t wait until I read a book in the Copley Coffee bathroom, but that’s gross, and no one should do that. Of course, I am the one who went in there with my phone and took pictures, but I have no way to avoid that at this time. Give the people what they want and all that.
I took myself to the Copley Coffee crapper and was pleased to find black and white tiled floors, light pink painted walls, and all the workings of a typical bathroom in working order. Emily and I have great appreciation when a business considers the needs of women without a charge, so the basket of pads and tampons on the bathroom wall delighted me. The other true delight in this bathroom is the sign on the mirror that reads, “Warning: Reflections in this mirror may be distorted by socially constructed ideas of ‘beauty.’” The vibe in this bathroom is something like “traditional Italian meets modern liberal,” which I think I have just invented.
The bathroom is just roomy enough to not feel crowded, but small enough to avoid wasting space. You can look at the fine Italian-style artwork on the walls while you do your thing, or you can try to count all the tiles. The only real problems in this bathroom are a) that the towel dispenser wasn’t dispensing towels, which I’m sure is already resolved, and b) the line that will exist to use it if there is a crowd of customers, which I suspect there will be.
I’m excited to see a new business on the Circle, and I’m even more excited to recommend its facilities to you with a 4.5/5 toilet rating. This potty has old-world character with modern-day charm and coffee and snacks aplenty.
Marissa has been writing about Akron bathrooms for The Devil Strip since 2015.
Northside Marketplace update
by Emily Dressler
I have already reviewed the bathrooms at Northside Marketplace, but it was when the space first opened and I don’t think it had found its groove yet. Fortunately, the Northside Marketplace had another grand opening of sorts before the end of December. A sandwich place called Nomz, a bakery, and a Stray Dog outpost opened on the same day. Personally, I was just happy to stumble upon a sandwich right when I needed it.
There are a lot of “best” things about the bathrooms at Northside Marketplace. The first best thing is the sign that has a stick person man, a stick person woman and a stick person alien. The sign reads “Whatever, just wash your hands.” Gender-neutral bathrooms make the most sense. It is a joy to see men and women wait in line together. Especially the men. I sort of want to be like, “Hey, come here often to this bathroom line, or is it your first time waiting?”
The second best thing about this bathroom is the two coat/bag hooks inside. Two! This just seems so thoughtful.
The last time I reviewed this bathroom, they had some watered down J.R. Watkins soap. Currently, they are rocking a sensor Gojo soap dispenser. This is a much better choice. The hand dryer is an intense hot-air dryer, the kind that makes the skin on your hands ripple. Don’t think about the air dryer blowing all those germs around. Shhhh. The toilet works and seems normal enough for a toilet. It has a right-sided flusher, which is more of a commercial toilet thing rather than a residential toilet thing. I implore you to pay attention to this.
The final best thing about this bathroom is what I found when I opened the baby-changing table. I thought it looked low to the ground, so I wanted to check (I am a diligent reviewer). Inside, I saw that someone had written “M + E” in magic marker. This could be someone’s positive self- affirmation, I guess. Or it could be that someone loves Urine Luck so much that they wrote our initials on a changing table. I didn’t do it, I promise. But I love it and I am pretending it stands for “Marissa plus Emily.”
The last time I reviewed this bathroom, I came up with an idea for my own company. I think, having learned that you can get a small vendor booth at Northside for a decent price, I wanted to sell crocheted dolls that stand up over toilet paper rolls. Okay, universe, I am picking up your hints, and I will build them into a tremendously smart business empire.
The bathroom here pleases me. And the Northside Marketplace is having a New Year’s Eve celebration. Perhaps I will spend the final minutes of 2018 in this bathroom, which earns 4.5/5 toilets.
Emily Dressler has been writing about Akron toilets for the Devil Strip since 2015. She has been enjoying them for eternity.