In this issue, we review the crappers in a park and a tavern.
by Marissa Marangoni and Emily Dressler
Of Taverns and Toilets by Marissa Marangoni
The Wolf Creek Tavern in Norton has been around since 1840, but I haven’t, so I don’t have an excuse for having to pee like a 175-year-old. After enjoying some Mystery Beers on the patio–half of which I guessed right and were free (!), I clumsily navigated my way to the facilities. After one wrong turn, I located the main bathrooms right by the entrance and the main indoor seating area.
I joined a one-person line outside of the women’s bathroom, which is right by the men’s, but I only waited long enough to see that both are single stalls, which I greatly appreciate. A waiter walked by and suggested I go upstairs. It was a pleasant surprise to find out that not only does WCT feature locally sourced food and entertaining beer games, but it also features two personal bathrooms for men and women each.
On my way upstairs, I couldn’t resist petting the velvet paisley-patterned designs on the wallpaper. At the top, there are two rooms for larger parties, but since there was no one else there, the place felt haunted. It it felt like the third floor of an old house, so naturally I imagined ghosts staring at me and then locked myself in the bathroom.
The upstairs bathrooms at WCT showcase clean spaces with low lighting and red floral wallpaper. The women’s bathroom was in good condition: everything was clean and functioning. Across from the sink, the best kind of paper towel dispenser is installed, meaning it did not require me to touch anything but the towel I needed.
My favorite part is the basket with “sundry” items. The basket holds a bottle of hairspray, a handful of pads, and a pile of tampons. When I see a place trying to take care of its ladies, I award it a gold star and will happily add a tampon to the collection (if i have one).
The men’s bathroom appeared to be in pretty much the same state as the women’s, just with the addition of some dirty paper towels on the floor. Men are weird.
The restroom facilities at Wolf Creek Tavern get 4.5 out of 5 toilets. If you find yourself in Norton, you can definitely go here and drink a few beers in peace knowing that you can empty your bladder comfortably.
Marissa Marangoni writes for a living and for fun and eats popcorn every single day–sometimes while she’s writing, and sometimes while she’s watching trashy TV.
Wolf Creek Tavern
3044 Wadsworth Rd.
Norton, OH 44203
Trails and Toilets by Emily Dressler
Ah, nature. The women’s restroom at the F. A. Seiberling Nature Realm Visitors Center is the queen of park bathrooms. We are spoiled with the majesty of the Metroparks, from the trails to the toilets.
The facilities are located near the entrance and are clearly marked. The women’s restroom has four stalls, none of which were occupied during my visit.
Inward-opening stall doors are bothersome. However, I have recently learned that such doors are in compliance with the Americans with Disabilities Act. Color me insensitive. A stall door can only open outward if there is a minimum clearance of four feet. Public restrooms should be larger to allow for out-swinging doors. Build it, bathroom architects. The people have spoken.
Sorry to harp on stall doors, but I’m small-to-average sized and practically have to stand in the toilet to open an in-swinging door. And here’s another thing: I shudder with disgust if my calf rubs against the toilet bowl. This is pathetic and I should get over it.
The wood-panelled ceiling is classy and serene. According to the Metroparks website, reclaimed lumber was used widely throughout the Visitors Center in the 2009-10 update.
Keeping with environmentally responsible design, new low-flow toilets use 48% less water than traditional toilets, according to the Metroparks website. Unless the Visitors Center has a secret problem with clogs, this water-saving endeavor probably still flushes turds down the toilet.
The updates also included bathroom sinks. The Metroparks website reports that they are constructed from recycled milk jugs and use 80% less water than typical hand washing stations. Maybe this is because only one of the faucets worked.
The Xlerator hand dryer is so forceful it makes the skin on your hands ripple. This is my favorite kind of hand dryer. They have replaced paper towels, for good reason.
The Nature Realm earns 4 out of 5 toilets.
Emily Dressler writes for a living and loves many different things so much.
Tues-Thurs 11am – 10 pm
F. A. Seiberling Nature Realm Visitors Center
1828 Smith Road
Akron, Ohio 44313
Tues-Sat 10 – 5
Sun 12 – 5